Bless you for caring for your parents. I know it’s not easy. We did have both my grandparents (who were like parents because they raised me) until my grandfather’s death. He had Alzheimer’s, but my grandmother remained in reasonably good shape for a number of years. She ended up being with us for over eighteen years, which was most of our homeschooling years. She could not be left alone for those years, so we had a very home-centered life except for church. For many reasons, it turned out to be the biggest blessing I’ve ever received, and I’m eternally thankful for it.

While we might have enjoyed a few more activities, the truth is that homeschooling works better when you are home-centered. The boys were able to be helpful in many ways, and they got to know their grandparents as few children have the chance to do. When something this important is happening, it can be very traumatic for children to be sent away for most of the day. To make it easier on all of us, I tried to schedule all errands and appointments on one day of the week, and would take one child at a time for special bonding time. The other thing you can do during this difficult time is to ask friends to pick up your girls and take them to activities. Many people will say, “let me know what I can do,” and they mean it, so let them help you in this way.

Very often a caregiving situation reaches a peak at which you think you can’t do it another day, and then it’s suddenly over. With a diagnosis like this, that would not be surprising. You may be able to obtain hospice care for your father, which is truly a blessing. It provides necessary medical equipment, paid for by Medicare, and enough good home healthcare to make everything go smoothly. From what I recall, hospice is prescribed by the attending physician, and many or most costs are covered by Medicare, though with the current healthcare changes, I don’t know for sure. Your father’s physician should know.

I hope that is helpful. You’ll be in my thoughts and prayers.

In the bond of Christ,
Marilee
Marilee

Thank you for sharing your story, Marilee. You’ll be in our thoughts and prayers– I know what it’s like. There are daily challenges and blessings, but like you, we found that the Lord gives grace and reveals the next step when it’s time.

My grandmother fell in July, and has been in a nearby nursing home since. It’s a completely different experience for us after so many years, but we’re just taking each day as it comes.

Grace and peace,
Janice

It takes a lot of wisdom to know when enough is enough and to get priorities right. Our 13 year old daughter is particularly troubled by this. It does make a different atmosphere in the home. I lean a lot on my husband to decide when it’s time for grandpa to live elsewhere. I am torn. I love him and want him home, but feel badly for our three children still at home( ages 19, 17, 13) having to live in this atmosphere. That being said, they are learning to care for him and help out and even take over when I need to be away.

Our older married children have helped care for grandpa when we were away also. I have homecare coming three days a week, so we are free to go out on those days. Grandpa has gone to the nursing home for respite care during the summer months when we are on holiday.

Spiritually, I am thankful to have the time to pray and read the Bible daily with grandpa. As his body gets weaker, his spirit is growing in sensitivity to God. This has been my prayer for my dad for so many years, and I see God working this out even through these difficult circumstances.

To love when it isn’t easy. To do hard things. Some of life’s most important lessons.
My husband and I daily pray together and ask for God’s help to do what is right.

We’ll trust God to lead us day by day, with joy , for His glory.

Marilee