![\"Keeping](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.doingwhatmatters.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/11\/keeping-thanks-in-thanksgiving-200x300.png?resize=200%2C300&ssl=1\")
<\/a>One way to approach a thanks-centered meal\u00a0is to focus on blessings. As the family gathers, provide two slips of paper to each person. Have them\u00a0write something they are grateful for and a blessing they would like to offer for the family. Place the slips in two\u00a0bowls, and pass them\u00a0around so everyone gets a gratitude note and a blessing.\u00a0At some point during or at the close of the meal, have each\u00a0person read the notes they have drawn. If tensions run high at your table, you may want to space the readings throughout the meal, using them to sidetrack rants and defuse tensions.<\/p>\nShare family\u00a0stories<\/h2>\n
The Thanksgiving table offers the opportunity to share bits of family history, with a focus on the elders that are present. Grandparents and great aunts and uncles have seen the world change in many ways in their lifetimes, and with a little prompting, can usually come up with a story or two\u2014sometimes revealing adventures for the very first time. Even if your elders\u00a0are prone to droning on a bit, their stories are slices of life worth remembering, and their presence is precious and worthy of attention.<\/p>\n
To spark memories, it\u00a0can be helpful to ask a starter questions such as:<\/p>\n
- \n
- How did you meet your husband\/wife?<\/li>\n
- What did you want to be when you grew up, and why?<\/li>\n
- What has been the happiest moment in your life?<\/li>\n
- What was the most useful lesson you ever learned, and how did you learn it?<\/li>\n
- What was your favorite activity (or food) when you were young?<\/li>\n
- What is the scariest thing you’ve ever done?<\/li>\n
- If you could relive any year of your life, what year would it be, and why?<\/li>\n
- If you could revisit any place you have been, where would it be, and why would you choose it?<\/li>\n
- Who has been the most influential person in your life?<\/li>\n
- If you could offer only one piece of advice to all of us, what would it be?<\/li>\n
- What do you wish you had known?<\/li>\n
- What are you most grateful for?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
Love one another<\/h2>\n
Although you can’t control what others do, you can prepare your heart to be loving and kind. Resolve to not fall for any deliberate aggravations \u2014\u00a0a bland\u00a0response such as “Hmmm” or “That’s an interesting perspective” coupled with the introduction of a different topic can often sink controversial issues.\u00a0Through it all, keep in mind that relationships are more important than opinions. Always.<\/p>\n
Share a prayer<\/h3>\n
This simple prayer offers a clear pathway for\u00a0growing in love, and does so in a memorable, poetic way.<\/p>\n
“Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
\nWhere there is hatred, let me sow love;
\nWhere there is injury, pardon;
\nWhere there is doubt, faith;
\nWhere there is despair, hope;
\nWhere there is darkness, light;
\nWhere there is sadness, joy.<\/p>\nO Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
\nTo be consoled as to console,
\nTo be understood as to understand,
\nTo be loved as to love;
\nFor it is in giving that we receive;
\nIt is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
\nIt is in dying to self that we are born to eternal life.”<\/p>\nAttributed to St. Francis of Assisi<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n
Here is the\u00a0prayer beautifully set to music by\u00a0John Rutter<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n